{"id":408,"date":"2005-01-22T10:33:39","date_gmt":"2005-01-22T16:33:39","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.fantasist.net\/scroll\/?p=408"},"modified":"2005-01-21T12:35:34","modified_gmt":"2005-01-21T18:35:34","slug":"free-porn-alternatives","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.fantasist.net\/scroll\/index.php\/2005\/01\/22\/free-porn-alternatives\/","title":{"rendered":"Free Porn Alternatives"},"content":{"rendered":"

Okay, so it occurred to me that there had to be a better way.
\nYeah, sure, I could talk about the evils of free porn until I’m blue in the face. I could even rant about how terrible it is to manipulate searchengines. Instead, I’m going to try and do it. Again.
\nYes, again. I did it once back in 2000\/2001 to get my other site ranked so highly on Google for the search terms “CNE resume” that it was the number one hit. I did all sorts of crazy things, not the least of which was start a blog, incidentally. One thing I did was look at both the Google Zeitgeist<\/a> and the Yahoo Buzz Index <\/a>and try to use those terms in my site. So, for instance, according to Google’s Zeitgeist<\/a>, I should talk about: how I felt about the Golden Globes and who won; the fact that Monday was Martin Luther King Jr. Day; what Teri Hatcher was wearing at the Golden Globes; who Teri Polo is and what she wore at the Golden Globes; what NASA has thrown into space lately; what “naughtiness” Prince Harry has been up to over in the UK; detailed specs on the iPod Shuffle; the super-model antics of Naomi Campbell; the fact that Mariska Hargitay also won a Golden Globe; and how the movie “Elektra” was doing in the box office. As you can see, that first hit, the Golden Globe Awards, was a really popular one, since it was repeated in, or was effected by, several later searches.
\nLast week, I should have been talking about: Amber Frey, the adulterous whore who was banging Scott Peterson; the terrible damage done by the tsunami in India; how terrible it is that Ashlee Simpson was caught lip-synching; Delta Airlines for some reason; the Weather Channel coverage of that tsunami in India; Heidi Klum, because it’s always a good time to talk about Ms. Klum (and she got married to Seal); NFL player Randy Moss, presumably because he sprained his ankle; the Orange Bowl, because it’s still football season; the fact that Brad Pitt is single again; and all the cool concept cars at the Detroit Auto Show. Crazy stuff, right?<\/p>\n

Well, according to Yahoo Buzz Index<\/a>, I should have talked about some very different things this week. If I wanted to get Yahoo hits, I should have talked about: OJ Simpson’s daughter, Sydney Simpson, getting arrested; Playboy Playmate Alicia Rickter, for obvious, pornographic reasons; those nuts over at Jibjab, who made another hit animation; Enter Location, because, uh, people were travelling a lot?; actress Elisabeth Harnois, possibly for the Golden Globes again?; O.J. Simpson, because his daughter got arrested, of course; the fact that Julian Ozanne got married to Gillian Anderson and no one knows who he is, but everyone knows her from the X-files; anything and everything about actress Lucy Liu, just because, she’s Lucy Liu; the Tennesse-based music and arts festival, Bonnaroo; “How We Do” almost anything, from the sound of it; eating “Breakfast and Brunch”? Or is that more travelling stuff?; how cheap Costco Wholesale pricing is; soap-opera star Annie Parisse, most likely because she moved on to something better; the fact that Japan had another big earthquake; and Jimjab.com, which is most likely a mistake for “jibjab.com”. <\/p>\n

Wow, those are totally different things, aren’t they? Are people who use those two different searchengines that different? Have I been losing out by optimizing for Google?
\nOh, I don’t know, but I think I’m going to go have a bit of a lay-down. This whole experience has been exhausting.
\n(And, yes, I’ve posted this same thing on my other blog, the Diary of a Network Geek<\/a>, for the same reason as the last post.)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Okay, so it occurred to me that there had to be a better way. Yeah, sure, I could talk about the evils of free porn until I’m blue in the face. I could even rant about how terrible it is to manipulate searchengines. Instead, I’m going to try and do it. Again. Yes, again. I […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_uf_show_specific_survey":0,"_uf_disable_surveys":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[20,19,14],"tags":[562,564,563,557,574,576,577,567,560,109,559,573,572,570,558,566,247,575,568,569,565,334,571,561,578,91],"class_list":["post-408","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-crass-commerce","category-criticism-marginalia-and-notes","category-news-and-current-events","tag-alicia-rickter","tag-amber-frey","tag-annie-parisse","tag-ashlee-simpson","tag-brad-pitt","tag-costco-wholesale","tag-delta-airlines","tag-elisabeth-harnois","tag-gillian-anderson","tag-google","tag-harry","tag-heidi-klum","tag-julian-ozanne","tag-lucy-liu","tag-martin-luther-king-jr","tag-naomi-campbell","tag-national-aeronautics-and-space-administration","tag-nfl","tag-randy-moss","tag-scott-peterson","tag-sydney-simpson","tag-tennesse","tag-teri-hatcher","tag-teri-polo","tag-tsunami","tag-yahoo"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.fantasist.net\/scroll\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/408","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.fantasist.net\/scroll\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.fantasist.net\/scroll\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.fantasist.net\/scroll\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.fantasist.net\/scroll\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=408"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.fantasist.net\/scroll\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/408\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.fantasist.net\/scroll\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=408"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.fantasist.net\/scroll\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=408"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.fantasist.net\/scroll\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=408"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}